Dartin: Now I'm mad.

Gotenks: You picked the right time for it, 'cause Gotenks is only going to make you madder!

Kairin: Where's the dragonball?

Kejek: I thought Shairo had it.

Shairo: I have the dragonball!

Azuri: Huh? That's two...

Katar: Not if Dartin gets them.

Dartin: *ENERGY FASTBALL!*

Gotenks: *Dodges, then sidekicks away from the ground*. I thought you were mad.

Dartin: *Makes an energy disk, but throws it so that the flat side heads for Gotenks*

*... and Gotenks gets smacked in the face and does a few backflips before regaining control*.

Kejek: *attempts to petrify Dartin*

Gotenks: It'll take more than that! How about a Super Gotenks Combo attack?

*Gotenks flies in as though to uppercut Dartin*

Dartin: *roars, stopping Gotenks in midair*.

Gotenks: Waah! Brush your teeth sometime, will you? It's not like I can't ... well... Super Ghost Kamikaze Attack!

Dartin: *blasts*.

*That explosion is pretty freaking huge. There's... not much snow for quite a distance. No idea where Dartin wound up.*

*Meanwhile, in... a rollercoaster on top of a hotel on top of a casino...*

Vegeta: Oh, I knew we should have waited for Bulma to build another radar.

Goku: Sorry; I didn't think she could spray us from in the car...

Vegeta: Awgh... my freaking eyes... Blast it, Kakkarrot! Let's just grab the dragonball and get out of here before that insane woman throws a cat at us!

Goku: We aren't stealing from old ladies, Vegeta.

Vegeta: Fine, but I'm not getting sprayed in the face again, got it?

Obaasan: Dragonball? You mean this is what you want? *holds up a dragonball*

Goku: Yeah! It'd be a big help if you gave it to us! There are some evil guys that might want them, and we don't want to give them the chance to--

Obaasan: Now wait a minute. You won't scare it out of me. You want this ball, you'll have to earn it.

Goku: Earn it? How?

Obaasan: Five card stud.

Goku: What's that?

Vegeta: Poker? Really? *sigh* Well, it can't be that ha--

Obaasan: At the casino's moderated tables.

Goku: Well, that doesn't sound too ha--

Obaasan: And if I win, you owe me a wig just like yours, except blond.

Goku: You mean like this? *goes SSJ, the ripples from which cause the building to sway and the rollercoaster to rattle dangerously*.

Obaasan(shockingly unphased): Yes, just like that!

Vegeta: *sigh*.

Goku: Well, it can't be that ha--

Vegeta: Just shut up and let me handle this...

Goku: Hey! Do you feel that?

Vegeta: Dartin's fighting the kids...

Goku: Can you handle this without me?

Vegeta: Absolutely. Just don't let anything happen to the children!

Goku: Jee, they're almost taller than--

Vegeta: Hurry!

Goku: All right. *Teleports*

Vegeta: Now this should be a lot easier...

Obaasan: *wields pepper spray threateningly*.

Kejek: Not again... *catches wand before it can fall into a gaping abyss*.

Vekin: Wow... I'm surprised that didn't hurt more.

Kairin: No joke. But where's everyone else?

Gotenks: *lands*. Wow. Hey, have you guys seen Azuri?

Vekin: No. Where are we? Those caves look too natural to be from the blast...

Kejek: That explosion must have threw us into a sinkhole.

Kairin: But Katar and Shairo aren't here. And where's Dartin?

Vekin: I think ... Dartin's still ...

Gotenks: Hey, that's --

Vekin: Goku!

Kairin: And where's everyone else?

Gotenks: I don't know. *prepares to go look for them*

Kejek: Wait...

Gotenks: What?

Kejek: No point in giving away our position.

Gotenks: Oh, fine; I'll send a Super Ghost.

Kairin: And get everyone blown up when Shairo pokes it?

Gotenks: Well, do you have any good ideas?

Kejek: Calm down. Expecto Patronum. *A silver horse jumps out of the tip of Kejek's wand*. We're in underground caves. Everyone's fine.

*The horse nods and leaps off into the distance*

Gotenks: ... What was that, some kind of crossover?

Daume: Hey!

*emerging from the darker parts of the caves is a group of tall, dark-skinned men wielding jagged spears and swords*.

Kairin: What's the big idea?

Gotenks: Who are you guys?

Vekin: Behind you!

*More of the tall guys emerge from other openings, and a sudden sulfurous mist fills the area.*

Kairin: What's that? Some kind of gas?

Kejek: Hold on, I'll conjur a bubble...

Daume: Keh!

*several of the newcomers hurl their weapons. Some strike stone; others strike one another in midair. All release sparks into the gascloud, and the whole group is suddenly zapped into unconsciousness.*

Goku: So you were after the dragonballs.

Dartin: No. I was after that. *Dartin wxtends a hand toward a cave, whose entrance was uncovered in the blast.*

Goku: Huh?

*Dartin blasts into the cave*

Goku: Ah! *can't outrun the blast, and the cave is crushed to rubble*.

Dartin: That just leaves one more. *turns to fly away*

Goku: Hey, what was that!

*Dartin flies off. Quickly.*

*Goku flies to the remains of the cave and lands*.

Goku: What was that about? Why'd he want to blow up this cave? *some rocks shift* Huh?

*Goku runs over and "gently" shoves some rocks aside, revealing Azuri, who has Shairo in one arm while the other is working at the rocks.*

Goku: Azuri! Where are the others?

Azuri(panting): Don't... know. *sits on some stable rocks*.

Shairo: My mommy fell in a hole...

Goku: Huh. Down there?

Shairo: Yes.

Goku: Stay here. I'll-- *Kejek's silver horse lands gracefully amid the three*. Huh?

Patronus(using Kejek's voice): We're in underground caves. Everyone's fine.

Goku: Cave? Ah! Dartin said there was one more! ... But he's gone away from here. Strange.

Katar: *flies up out of the hole*. Stupid... shadow... *collapses onto the rocks*

Azuri: Is that a halo?

Goku: I think it is. But that means... Dartin knows something about the death cave! There must have been more, and now that we used one against Broli, he's destroying all of them!

Azuri: But where are the others?

*The Horse jumps and turns gracefully, standing ready to lead the way.*

Goku: I think he knows the way. Do you think you'll be ok following Horse while I try to deal with Dartin?

Azuri: I'm ready to go to sleep.

Goku: Are you sure you aren't just hungry?

Azuri: ! Trunks had the picnic we brought!

Shairo: Picnic?

Katar: Wha? *Rubs temples*.

Goku: Picnic? ... Hmm. Maybe I'll stay and... *sigh*. Oh well. *BAMF*

Azuri: Hey, are you ok?

Katar: Katar, actually. *sits up* I feel like I just died...

Azuri: Ehe. Yeah. Do you need something?

Katar: I'll live. *gets up*. Shairo?

Shairo: Yes, Mommy?

Katar: Are you ok?

Shairo: Yes.

Katar: Where are Kairin and the others?

Patronus: *stamps hoof impatiently*

Shairo: The horsey knows.

Azuri: Maybe you should ri--

*The horse takes off, and Shairo bearly follows in time to keep up, Azuri and Katar trailing behind.*

*Meanwhile...*

Goku: Jee, again?

Vegeta: Shut up, Kakkarrot! Gah! Why's it always the blasted eye!

Goku: Did you get the dragonball?

Vegeta: No I didn't get the damn dragonball!

Goku: I thought you'd be good at poker...

Vegeta: Apparently that old crone is better.

Goku: So what's with the eyes?

Obaasan: Hemrhoid-troll was a sore loser.

Goku: I told you not to try and steal it!

Vegeta: Shut up, Kakkarrot!

Obaasan: Someone owes me a wig.

Goku: Uh... Ve...Geta?

Vegeta: WHAT!

Goku: ... Where would we find a wig?

Vegeta: I gh--... You know what? I know just the place.

Goku: All right! Where is it?

Vegeta: Right this way.

Goku: Huh? Where are we going? Hey, are those candycanes?

Obaasan: They're barber's pillars, wig-ower.

Goku: Umm... what-pillars?

Kerufu: Can I help you?

Vegeta: *Pulls out Capsule Corp. credit card*. I believe you can.

Goku: Vegeta... what... are we... doing?

*Meanwhile, with the tertiary cast that has effectively taken over the primary cast's screentime...*

Kairin: *wakes up in a prison cell*. Wha? Where... what... Huh.

Daume: This one is awake.

Kejek: Can we at least get the capsules back?

Daume: Hold your requests, sun-pig. *signals to guards who drag Kairin (gently) from his cell*.

Goten(Still in a cell... with Trunks, since they defused while in prison): I'm hungry.

Kairin: Where's...

Kejek: Weapons, capsules, dragonballs... all being held somewhere.

Kairin: Hmm.

Daume: You will be escorted to where you may be cleansed and relieved.

Kairin: Huh?

Kejek: Bathroom.

*And the guards march them out to a well-lit concrete slopey path. Though no lightsource--or sky for that matter--is visible.*

Kairin: Weird. What is this place...

Kejek: I think we're better off not worrying about that for now.

Kairin: What are the guards for? If we wanted out... what's stopping us?

Daume: Don't forget that you were captured once.

Kairin: Hmmph. *tries to draw in light*.

Kejek: No.

Kairin: -_-.

*Brought to doors that read 'male', 'female' and 'slaves'...*

... *and only let into the 'slaves' door...*

*Pretty big bathroom, I guess. L-shaped, with lots of urinals along the walls. That's... mostly it.*

Kairin: This looks like...

Kejek: Urinals?

Kairin: Jaavan's work.

Kejek: Jaavan? Hmm.

Kairin: There's... something to worry about, here, isn't there?

Kejek: We should probably lay low...

Kairin: *raises a foot as though to step into the nearest urinal*

Kejek: *pulls him back* You might not want to do that.

Kairin: Meh.

Kejek: Do you not think they're watching?

Kairin: I'd hope not, considering what room we're in.

Kejek: Let's not jump to anything until we have to.

Vekin: *stumbles in*. Are there no ... slaves... besides us?

Kejek: Well, this place does look empty.

Kairin: *holds his hand palm-upward and stares into it thoughtfully.*

Vekin: What's Kairin doing?

Kejek: Who knows?

Vekin: It's weird that an underground city would have all of these things. Most of their clothing and weapons and some of the buildings and paths look like they were made centuries ago.

Kejek: They've probably been isolated here for as long. Someone must be supplying them... but they don't seem to like surface-dwellers.

Kairin: You got all of that already?

Kejek: I was the first to wake up, remember?

Vekin: Did they tell you anything?

Kejek: They like calling us sun-pigs, at --

*Kairin lets light flow out of his hand and wash over the inside of a urinal, creating a shimmering mirror-like pool of light.*

Kejek: What are you doing, now?

Jaavan(from urinal): *glares*

Kejek: Close that!

Jaavan(in image): *holds up a finger*. *opens a palm and apparently touches the surface of the pool, and more light ripples across it, changing the image to that of large starfield, a central mass of lights churning and blocking all under it from view*.

Vekin: What's going on? *comes closer to get a better look*.

*in the image, a massive burst of blue-violate light ignites at the center of the mass of lights, rotates to reveal itself as a beam, then shatters, as a penprick of blackness appears in the middle of the lights, only for a cloud of pink to gush from it*.

Kairin: What is that, some sort of black hole with indigestion?

Kejek: It looks like a quasar that just had a gamma ray burst in its core. But that pink stuff...

*The image swirls a bit, and the lights at the center keep swirling, as though flushed into the blackness, to be replaced with a pink dot.*

Kairin: Black hole sounds right.

Kejek: No, definitely not...

Vekin: Then what is it?

*The image zooms in on Kid Buu, with a purplish glow around him. Buu flies out of the glow, and an entire planet comes out of it.*

Vekin: Some portal ate the quasar?

Kejek: Either that, or that pink thing.

*A yellow spaceship flies off of the planetoid, which is itself sent spiraling into the void; the ship follows Buu, then leads him out of the image*.

Kejek: Look familiar?

Kairin: Majin Buu! His original form?

Vekin: Was that him entering the universe?

Kejek: Maybe.

*The image zooms out slowly, panning to four planets left, formerly orbiting the quasar at a safe distance (somehow). Buu flies by and obliterates one. An indigo ship flees from the destruction of the second, and falls hazardously toward the third.*

Vekin: Do you recognize these ships?

Kairin: The yellow one made me think of Bibidi's.

Kejek: Probably was the same one.

*The image zooms in on the third planet, where the atmosphere is suddenly covered in a shimmering black dome. Buu throws a blast at it, but the darkness holds. Bibidi appears, apparently yelling at Buu, and suddenly Buu is sucked into his ball*.

Kairin: Wait, what?

Vekin: Maybe Bibidi couldn't see through the dome?

Kejek: A mage with his powers... I'm not so sure.

Vekin: Hey! Those people...

*The image zooms in on a circle of three-eyed people in pale gray robes, all of whom look exhausted.*

Vekin: They have three eyes, just like Master Tien...

*The image dissolves to show a group of cool-colored aliens being greeted by the three-eyed people, the indigo ship in the background.*

Kejek: Refugees from that planet Buu destroyed living with the three-eyed people. Ok.

Kairin: What does this have to do with...

Kejek: Wait.

*the image again dissolves, this time to Bojak glaring hungrily at a painting of an alien landscape. As the image moves, we see that Bojak is standing in the indigo ship seen previously, only now it is seated in what looks like a museum.*

Kairin: What does that... mean?

Vekin: Maybe he's homesick?

*The next scene is of Bojak blasting at the three-eyed planet from above a tower.*

Kejek: ... Really homesick.

Kairin: Might not be the best word.

*The image dissolves to a series of scenes of three-eyed people and creatures resembling Freeza, with Bojak's crew fighting through them.*

*Bojak is seen standing on a balcony on the indigo ship, arms outstretched. The image pans to show the fourth planet--now the only surviver--and it is spinning wildly through space.*

Vekin: He moved the planet?

Kairin: I doubt that was his plan.

Kejek: It'd still kill them to be away from a heatsource. And if not, messing with the planet's motion like that would either flatten everyone, throw them off, or damage the atmosphere and let radiation in.

*The scene fades to the planet's surface, where a group of Freeza's race looks on as the three-eyed people hold up their hands, filling the sky with light.*

Vekin: I know that technique!

Kairin: Ur... So do I?

Kejek: Everyone does, but this looks like something else. The Solar Flare just shines in people's eyes... this looks more like an artificial sun.

*The image dissolves to the same world, only a bit darker, with Freeza seated in his hoverchair on a balcony, overlooking a dark area below a strange-looking palace.*

Kairin: What, no Dartin backstory?

*A couple of three-eyed people stand at Freeza's side as though talking to him. One kneels; the other frowns.*

Kejek: They became Freeza's advisors?

*The older, frowning one is suddenly thrown into the air off of the balcony. Freeza closes his eyes, smiles, and flicks his fingers, and the victim is destroyed in a burst of power.*

Kairin: ... for a while.

*the image ripples like water, and a gurgly-distorted voice speaks*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): You now see Guopin, most loyal to Freeza. Jienki, who felt the three-eyed clan was disrespected, and wanted to prove otherwise. And Jaavan, who submitted to Freeza out of survival.

*Three of the advisors are shown. The youngest, Jienki, kneels before Freeza.*

Kairin: You could have started talking earlier...

Jaavan(OS, distorted): The three-eyed clan was kept quiet on Freeza's original homeworld. Their powers and religion made them a valuable asset, but Freeza and his empire focused on technology and brute force. Freeza had heard rumors of Namek, however, and did not reject advice from his spiritual secret advisors.

*The scene switches to show Freeza's alien soldiers at a bar, apparently laughing histerically*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): But the clan was the butt of jokes to the rest of the universe. Fairytales, even, as they had dwendled in number.

*A shot of Captain Ginyu's body from Namek's species holding some of Freeza's soldiers captive.*

Jaavan: Jienki joined the military to prove himself, and his clan.

*Jienki is restrained by the horned creatures, but suddenly sprouts extra arms and breaks free, releasing the rest of Freeza's army.*

Jaavan(OS, Distorted): But it was pointless.

*The rest of the troop is seen mocking Jienki, who gets angrier and angrier until he lashes out in rage. As the fight progresses, his extra arms return, and he is struggling to hold off a dozen of his comrades.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Jienki did accomplish something, however.

*The image shows Vento talking to the biggest of the group, who orders the others off and harshly orders Jienki into a building.*

*Dissolve to Vento and one of the three advisors on Freeza's world, while Jienki instructs a younger three-eyed boy in the background.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): He led Vento to me. Vento was eager to learn practices that were dismissed by the rest of the universe. So I taught.

Kairin: Thanks a lot.

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Jienki instructed his cousin, Tartena, in the arts of disguise.

Vekin: I didn't see that coming...

Kejek: He apparently did pretty well.

Jaavan(OS, distorted): I initially rejected the practice. Jienki had resorted to fleeing from the ancestory he had fought for.

*The image dissolves to Freeza destroying Planet Vegeta.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Then Freeza destroyed the Saiyans.

*Dissolve to Freeza's army, including the likes of Dodoria, Cui and the Ginyu Force, hunting down Saiyans on various planets.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): So I saw my opportunity.

*The image dissolves to Tullece, Katar and Yabu looking up at spacepods in the atmosphere of a strange world. Jaavan walks up to them.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): I disguised my race as Tartena had, but did not reject the practices of my ancestors.

*In the image, Jaavan gestures, and a swirling mist forms into a portal to what we know as Jaavan's palace.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): I provided a handful of Saiyans with protection from Freeza, in exchange for a place of honor in the new world I thought would form.

*Dissolve to the three saiyans standing before Jaavan in an orchard of some kind. Tullece Blasts a fruit out of a tree, and we see that it is the tree of might. Jaavan raises a hand, but Tullece simply blasts him back and runs off.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): But they betrayed me. So I created my own army.

*The image changes to reveal Jaavan's minions pursuing Katar*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): One day, Vento appeared as he reached through the boundaries of the universe.

*Dissolve to Vento, holding a glowing stone about as big as he is.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): He used what I taught him to bind Freeza's soul to a shard of Planet Namek. Used it as a link to the dead, and even to control objects from afar.

*Shot of Yamcha, Videl, Chaozu and Gohan fighting a giant sword.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): And even drew out the transformed body of Nubaru, a demon guarded by Dabura himself in the demon realm.

*Brief shot of the green jello-giant stomping on Goku.*

Vekin: The Ki-strangler!

Kairin: Woah...

Jaavan(OS, distorted): I soon discovered that Vento intended to resurrect Freeza as a god, and make himself the high priest.

*Image of the Freeza Doll hovering over the glowing stone while Vento wields a glave nearby. Tartena is busy with Liquaro and Rani off to the side.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): You stopped them, so I watched you.

Kejek: Wait, what?

*Shot of Kejek snatching a book out of Elanmak's hands.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): And found a disciple I thought I could trust.

Kejek: Yeah, that worked well, didn't it?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Until those criminals discovered magic. I'd hoped that Bibidi's potara would allow me to bind Tartena, Vento and Freeza to my death stone.

*Appropriate shot of said stone...*

Kairin: But Elanmak used it to release the darklings instead?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): No.

*Scene of Rani fighting King Cold*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Elanmak used it to release Freeza's father. I tried to reason with him. I even gave him a power beyond all mortals...

*Shot of Elanmak glowing green.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): The chaos would have doomed him eventually. He refused to seek my assistance once he betrayed me and released the darklings, with help from Vento and the criminals.

*Scene of Goten paralyzed in the room with Fatty, Not-fatty, Cell, Freeza, Broli, and a glowing green Elanmak in the corner.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Had he come to me, I could have kept it from destroying him. But he was careless.

*Scene of Cell absorbing Elanmak's chaos energy.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): I did what I could...

*Jaavan's minions standing between Elanmak and Cell*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): But my greatest student chose his own path.

Vekin: What's this have to do with us?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Vento and Elanmak used their Freeza stone and the deathstone that Elanmak took to create links between life and death. I took to the same tactic.

*Scene of Broli falling into a cave*

Kairin: The death caves...

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Yes. But Dartin knows of them, and has sought their destruction.

Kairin: Who is Dartin?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): None of them realize it, but Dartin is the result of Cell's reproduction upon absorbing souls in Hell. He is destined to merge with Cell and the other darklings.

*Shot of a pink-skinned, King Cold-sized figure in Freeza's armor and red spandex, his head cowled like Cell's and green marks on his cheeks.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): And not even Cell realizes that he will willingly participate.

Vekin: Why are you telling us this?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Dartin destroyed my cave in the snow. One of the saiyans escaped death by it just before.

Kairin: Katar!

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Dartin is heading for the last cave. I can take you there.

Kejek: Why not go yourself?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): If I die defending Docho Shini, then you will never defeat the darklings. Only I can sustain the cave's power.

Vekin: What's in it for you?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Freeza's permanent downfall, along with those that have bent the traditions of the three-eyed clan for evil. You can't kill the dead in this form. Only Docho Shini can do that.

Kairin: What about the others?

Jaavan(OS, distorted): Your friends are fine.

*the image ripples and shows Katar, Azuri and Shairo following Kejek's Patronus through caves.*

Jaavan(OS, distorted): If you take this portal, you will arrive at Docho Shini.

Vekin: Goten and Trunks are still back there.

Daume(OS, shouting): KEH KEH KEH! *incoherent mysterious language*.

Kairin: I think ... someone's gotten out.

*A guard goes flying through the bathroom door, only to land unconscious on the floor.*

Kairin: O...k...

Katar: Funny meeting you here.

Kejek: Nice head accessory.

Shairo: Catch! *Throws wand and Quadblade* *A little fast. Which... costs Kairin pantleg*.

Kairin: Yikes!

Kejek: *goes for wand*. Jaavan has portals here.

Katar: What? *elbows an approaching guard in the side, sending him to the ground*.

Vekin: He showed us a slideshow about... a lot of things.

Kairin: He says that Dartin's destroying the death caves, and if we hurry, we can reach the last one before it's too late.

Katar: Deathcaves, Dartin, and Jaavan... none of that sounds like as much fun as this. *sidekicks another guard*.

Trunks: *clears the guards outside the bathroom*. Did you find them?

Katar: Everyone's here. Right?

Kejek: Yeah.

Trunks: Then let's get out of here...

*Kejek's Patronus races into the room and disappears into his wand.*

Kairin: Jaavan...

Katar: Is a jerk.

Kejek: Have you looked above your head lately?

Katar: What? *notices halo*. What the...

Kejek: Dartin didn't come for the dragonballs. He destroyed one of Jaavan's caves.

Katar: I died, then? ...

Trunks: What's going on?

Vekin: Are we going?

Kairin: We've been here too long. If Jaavan's right, Dartin's probably to Docho Shini by now.

Kejek: *sigh*. All right. This feels dangerous, but I'll go if anyone else does.

Vekin: Then let's get going.

Trunks: The exit's this way.

Kairin: We have another.

Trunks: *walks in* where?

*A urinal flushes; Shairo apparently used the portal for its more obvious purpose while everyone was talking.*

Kejek: ... Probably not that one.

*Meanwhile, in a noisy classy hotel...*

Goku: BUT WE DON'T HAVE TIME!

Vegeta: Why's that, Nappa?

Goku: Dartin's going to destroy something...

Obaasan: I'll destroy your face if I don't get my wig!

Kerufu: Here we are. The hair, and the dye.

Goku: Can we get out of here, now?

Obaasan: Wait just a minute. You haven't put it all together yet! That's just a bunch of yellow hair; I can't wear it!

Goku: Um, you can take it from here, right Vegeta?

Vegeta: *throws a credit card at someone* Make a wig out of this!

*Goku's bald now. ^_^. A real Goku's Hair Wig is hard to find. So they used actual Goku hair instead.*

Goku: Come on, Vegeta! Let's go!

Vegeta: No dragonball?

Obaasan: What was that?

Vegeta: Fine, let's get going!

*Goku grabs Vegeta and they teleport away*

Cell: Broli's cage is empty. You'll fill it nicely.

*he throws Yamcha and Sejes into the cage, then closes the door*. Fatty, if you please?

Not-fatty: The one's that have released and helped you for so long deserve a bit more respect...

Cell: I could always kill you.

Yamcha: Yeah, good luck holding me back then!

Not-fatty: That's true. Without us, you'll have to deal with the blond guys on your own.

Cell: I'm not afraid of them.

Dartin: You should be. *lands*.

Cell: The silent one speaks.

Dartin: My friends, if you'd be so kind...

Not-fatty: You heard the man.

*Yamcha and Sejes are nigh immoble in their prison.*

Not-fatty: And I'll take that shiny thing...

Yamcha: Keep... your hands... off of that...

Cell: A dragonball. Excelent! So, you thought you'd use them against us, did you? It seems to have backfired.

*Bald Goku and Vegeta appear*

Goku: Not so fast, Dartin!

Cell: That's a first...

Dartin: Of course. I deliberately allowed them to follow me here.

Goku: Huh?

Vegeta: It's a trap! Get us out of--

*Dartin smacks Vegeta into the side of the cage*.

Goku: Vegeta! *lunges, but Dartin throws him aside.*

Cell: *opens the cage*.

Vegeta: *throws a credit card like a Shuriken, clipping one of Cell's wings.*

Cell: What was...

Vegeta: *palm to Cell's face* *Knees* *overhead double-handed SMASH! Cell goes down!*

Dartin: *flips Vegeta into the cage*

Yamcha: Goku, look out! Cell's...

Cell: *blasts Yamcha through the shoulder*. Enough of that.

Goku: Grr... Stop it!

Cell: And what are you going to do, blind me with your shiny bald head?

Goku: *flies at Cell with ... ur... a SSJ aura...* *Cell blocks the first few strikes, but Goku Kicks Cell in the gut, and he staggers.*

Dartin: *Appears on the other side of Cell and breath-blows Goku back into the cage*.

Not-fatty: *Closes the door*. Well done! Truly our finest accomplishment.

Cell: *winded* Not... Yet.

Dartin: Not too quickly.

Cell: What?

Dartin: If you absorb them now, it will draw the attention of the others.

Cell: What does it matter? If I can assimilate Goku and Vegeta's power into my own, the likes of Gohan will be no match for me.

Dartin: If you leave them, noone will notice. They'll be distracted by my plan.

Cell: Your plan?

Dartin: I'm going to destroy the last deathcave. That way there's no way they can return us to mortal form. I will use enough power to draw out all those that remain. I will draw out their full power. Then, while they are at bay, you can have your fun, and enough power to destroy all. All but me.

Cell: Hahahaha... Very well. You carry out that plan. I will wait until I sense that Gohan and that Saiyan with the coat are with you.

*Remember that giant Casino/Hotel with the rollercoaster on the roof where Goku lost his hair?*

*It explodes in a massive ... explosion.*

Elohssa: Goku and Vegeta were just here. Where could they have gone? *Flies off*

*meanmeanwhile...*

Kairin: Seriously you guys, toilet portal as a thrill ride. Why doesn't the ministry of magic use that?

Kejek: They do.

Kairin: Seriously? Why didn't I know that?

Kejek: *shrug*.

Goten: He's not here yet.

Trunks: That's assuming Jaavan sent us to the right place.

Goten: Well, we have time to eat.

Trunks: Maybe...

Azuri: I got the capsules...

Trunks: All right, then!

*Cave-Picnic~!*

Shairo: Why don't we have a picnic?

Kairin: We didn't bring any food...

Katar: *sigh*. Since I'm undead now, maybe I should keep watch.

Vekin: As powerful as Dartin is, we'll probably sense him coming.

Kejek: We don't know if Dartin's really coming. A lookout wouldn't hurt.

Kairin: Can you protect this place?

Kejek: I wish. This place is weird enough already.

Trunks(Mouth full?): If Jaavan could protect this place, he wouldn't need us.

Kejek: I'm not sure we use the same magic...

Vekin: Someone's coming...

Katar: Incoming!

Dartin: *Lands outside and powers up*.

Trunks: That's our cue!

Goten: Gotenks?

Trunks: I doubt it's been long enough.

Azuri: Ugh, not if there's another way...

Kairin: What are you complaining about?

Azuri: Come on... Joining bodies? O_O

Kairin: Eck... Point made.

Kejek: Another Kamikaze ghost might do it...

Goten: His power keeps rising! Unreal!

Trunuks: We've waited too long. Let's go!

*Goten and Trunks fly out, followed closely by Azuri*.

Kejek: Let's surround the battlefield. Kairin, stay with me.

Kairin: Plan?

Kejek: Once we get into the light, start charging your fan as much as you can.

Kairin: Ur... it doesn't ... work quite like that...

Kejek: Can you do it?

Kairin: Probably, but I can't promise...

Kejek: Let's try it anyway. Vekin, can you do that dragon thing still?

Vekin: Yeah.

Kejek: If we get him in here, use that to cut off the exit. Maybe we can get him killable that way.

Vekin: Ok.

Katar: What about me?

Kejek: I think we'll need someone to catch.

Katar: Catch? ... Whatever you say, Mr. Tactics.

Kairin: He prefers 'Indy'.

Kejek: What?

Vekin: Hey, I remember...

Kairin: Ah, right. Vow of secrecy. Sorry.

Kejek: ... O...k. Let's get going!

*Meanwhile, where there isn't an annoyingly long pseudo conversation...*

Goten: KAMEKAMEHA!

Trunks: Buster can--You still say Kamekameha?

Azuri: Trunks!

Trunks: Ah! Buster CANNON!

Dartin: *flicks both away*. I see you survived. And got here first, no less.

Trunks: Sorry to disappoint you.

Dartin: Actually, this makes things more interesting. *grabs Goten's wrist, spins him around and holds him by the neck*. This should get attention, do you agree?

Trunks: Let him go, now!

Dartin: I don't need to make you move to destroy that cave. You'll have to make me.

Trunks: *Prepares to charge, but Dartin holds Goten higher and in front of him*.

Azuri: *Sends lightning at Dartin's arm* *the strike isn't damaging, but forces him to release his hold on Goten, at least enough that Goten can break free.*

Dartin: Cute. *He slashes Goten's back with a knife-hand, and sends him falling forward*.

Trunks: *Rushes Dartin and attacks relentlessly.*

Dartin: *Brickwall*

Azuri: *Catches Goten*. Are you ok?

Goten: I've been worse.

Dartin: *Brings out both arms to cross-strike through Trunks's shoulders, when a fiery bird flies in and pecks him in the neck.*

Dartin: What...?

*The bird transforms into a glowing Quad-blade that discharges into Dartin's face before spinning around to strike him in the back*.

Katar: *catches the quad blade, charges it with her own energy, then throws it like a disk, striking Dartin squarely in the neck*.

*The weapon falls to the ground at last, and there is silence.*

Goten: Trunks?

Trunks: ... *punches Dartin in the face, then flies to where Goten and Azuri are.*

Dartin: I'm going to kill you.

Trunks: Goten! Combo time!

Azuri: *makes a cloud of fire that assaults Dartin*

Goten/Trunks: Burning Kamehameha!

*Pretty colors!*

Dartin: *an explosion throws them all back*.

Gohan: That's enough of that.

Dartin: Perfect. Just let me finish your friends first.

Gohan: *appears in front of Dartin* No. *Engages in a fierce hand-to-hand struggle with Dartin*.

*Meanwhile, at Broli's Lair...*

Cell: And there's Gohan.

Goku: You'll never defeat him, Cell. Not... in a million... years...

Cell: At least I'll have the power of the legendary Goku on my side.

*Walks to a point where he might be able to stick his tail through the cage, signature stepping sounds and all.*

Tien/Chaozu: DODON RAY!

Cell: What?

*Fatty and Not-Fatty fall with holes through their heads*.

Yamcha(clutching bloody shoulder, on the ground): Tien and Chaozu!

Goku: Just in time, guys!

Cell: No! Insolent pests!

Vegeta: *tears a bar out of the cage and thrusts it into Cell's mouth*.

Goku: All right. Together this time?

Vegeta: Hmmph.

*Goku and Vegeta both charge Cell, who dodges, tears another piece from the cage, and hurls it at Goku's back.*

Chaozu: *stops the bar in mid air*

Goku: *turns and kicks the bar back into Cell's chest!*

Vegeta: I think he's outmatched.

Cell: You will never defeat me! NEVER! *Mouth-blast*

Vegeta: *deflects with ease*. Nappa's attack? Really?

Goku: I don't know, it looked more like Piccolo's.

Cell: Try a Freeza! *Throws energy disks*

Goku: *teleports behind Cell and elbows him in the back*

Vegeta: *Flies at Cell, bringing the disks with him*.

Cell: *teleports to Tien and Chaozu* Say goodbye to your weakling friends!

Chaozu: Tien!

Cell: *hand-swipe*

*Goku appears out of nowhere and catches the attack*. No. Tien, Chaozu, thanks for saving us. I think it's best that you leave now.

*A sokidan pops up from below and distracts Cell*.

Yamcha: Come on, you guys!

Sejes: Wait! *Goes and grabs the dragonball from Not-Fatty's body*.

Yamcha: Great work, Sejes! Let's go while we have a chance!

*Back at the gates of Hell...*

Trunks: I'm beginning to think Fusion might not be a bad idea.

Goten: Gohan's doing just fine.

Trunks: But Dartin's holding back, and Gohan's not...

Goten: All right.

Trunks: Let's go over there a bit. *They fly off*.

Yabu: *flies in and kicks Dartin in the back*.

Gohan: Nice save.

Yabu: Hmmph.

Dartin: *comes back and flat-blasts them both*.

Kejek: Gohan! Hit him into the cave!

Gohan: Huh?

Dartin: Go for it. I dare you.

Gohan: *Lunging Strikes!*

Yabu: *Finger beams*.

Dartin: *blocks beams with one hand, tollerates Gohan with the other.*

Kairin: Together they might stand a chance...

Shairo: What's that? *points at a kamikaze ghost that's flying at Dartin*.

Kejek(Voice amplified): Gohan! DODGE!

Gohan: Dodge?

Yabu: *blasts Gohan aside*

Dartin Grabs Yabu and throws him into the path of the ghost.*

Gohan: That's not good...

*Another ghost flies in from behind, and Dartin is caught in the explosion!*

Gohan: I guess this is it. Ka...me...

Cell: Hi. *TAG! Gohan goes down!*

Kairin: What? We had a chance...

Kejek: We still do.

Gotenks: Hey! Why don't you exercise some courtesy? Sneak attacking an overwhelmed opponent was already done in this battle!

Cell: Did you know that Tien and Chaozu were on their way?

Dartin: No.

Cell: I hope not. Otherwise I might have a new meal in mind.

Dartin: We'll deal with that once I'm done here.

*A gold dragon rises from the cave, barring Dartin's way.*

Kejek: What's he doing? He was supposed to wait until Dartin was in the cave!

Yabu: *Flies out of the cave and smacks Dartin into a boulder*.

*A dark, translucent silver dragon forms around the cave.*

Cell: What's this?

Kejek: We need Tien.

Kairin: Tien?

Kejek: Yes. And if I had to guess...

*Goku and Vegeta appear*.

Cell: Where's the rest of our support? Ah well. I don't need them.

Kejek: Goku! Go get Tien!

Goku: Huh?

Kejek: We need Tien! Hurry!

Dartin: *rains energy against the Russian Doll Dragon(s)*.

Gotenks: *Flies into Dartin's back* *Proceeds to fly around doing disorienting maneuvers, keeping Dartin off of the cave*.

Goku: *BAMF*

Vegeta: Gohan, hurry up and finish Cell, or I'll do it for you.

Gohan: You could help.

Vegeta: Let's not let him think he could ever have beaten one saiyan, even a halfbreed.

Cell: You've made yourself next, Vegeta. Just how you like it.

Gohan: *punches Cell in the abdomen*.

Vekin(Pseudo-telepathic): Come on, guys... I can't hold up for much longer...

Kejek: Vekin, ease back.

Vekin(Pseudo-telepathy): What?

Kejek: Ease off, just for a second...

Gohan: So long, Cell! *Gohan smashes Cell to the ground.*

Yabu: *throws a large blast that forces Cell into the mouth of the cave.*

Cell: No you don't... *tries to teleport*. What.. .I can't...

Vekin(Pseudo-telepathy): Back at full... but I can't hold it...

Gohan: All right. Let's make this count.

Cell: Fine! I'll blast my way out!

Kejek: Put your power on the walls.

Vekin(Pseudo-telepathy): Whatever you say...

*Cell's explosion is met by Yabu*.

*Goku and Tien appear*.

Goku: Tien's here! Now what?

Kejek: Hold on...

Gohan: *flies close to the mouth of the cave and fires a Kamehameha into Cell, forcing him back into the darkness.*

Cell: No... No... NO!!!

Dartin: You were the one foolish enough to plot to absorb your allies, Cell. You thought absorbing Goku and Vegeta would let you overpower me. You intended to assimilate Freeza and the others. I offered you teamwork.

Cell: DAAAAMMMNNN YOOOUUU!!! *Dies*.

Dartin: *slaps Gotenks in the face and flies toward Gohan*

Kejek: Tien, now!

Tien: Tribeam! *Flies in and pushes Dartin back.

Dartin: Mistake. *a flood of green comes out of the cave, and scatters everyone outside. Dartin holds out his arms and embraces it, but pales slightly.*

Kejek: Tien, in the cave!

Tien: What?

Vekin(Pseudo-telepathy): The dragon technique...

Tien: It's...

Jaavan(Pseudo-telepathy): You are the only true descendant of the my clan. Complete our shield to protect this cave from Dartin!

Tien: ... *flies into the cave*.

*the dragons merge into a vibrant purple, as it sprouts wings, and a beefy arm... out of the back of its neck, there...*

Dartin: The chaos isn't reacting with my body as I'd hoped... I must leave...

Tien/Vekin/Jaavan(pseudo-telepathy): TROGDOR!

*Fire issues from the dragon's mouth, and Dartin is swept away in the torrent of BURNiNATION!*

*... and all the little humans on the ground struggle to avoid the same fate.*

Goku: Way to go, Tien!

*The dragon becomes stone, and Tien and Vekin emerge from the last drips of tiel and gold (respectively) flame that fall from its mouth.*

Vekin: Master Tien...

Tien: Master nothing. You've done well. Keep training, and some day, you might not need the dragon to be Earth's strongest human.

Goku: Yeah! Of course, Krillin might have something to say about that.

*Ridiculous "everybody laughs" closing sequence.*

Vegeta: ... What the... *answers phone*. Hello?

Gohan: Hey, I'm getting a call, too...

Bulma(phone): Where are you! The city where that dragonball was has been completely destroyed! Vegeta? Vegeta!

Vegeta: I heard you, woman! What are you babbling about?

Videl(phone): Gohan, I'm standing at a ruined city... Where did you go?

Gohan: Sorry, Videl; Goten and Trunks were kinda in trouble...

Vegeta: Kakkarrot took me away to fight Dartin, and we've been busy ever since. The city was just fine when I left it.

Goku: Wait, but does that mean... my... hair?

*Everyone suddenly notices Goku's lack of said hair.*

Videl(phone): There's some strange looking guy standing here...

Gohan: What's he look like?

Videl(Phone): He looks like he's made of spare parts... and... his head is a giant eyeball?

Gohan: Eyeball?

Goku: Elohssa?

Videl(phone): I think he's coming this way. Gohan?

Gohan: Hold on... see if you can talk to him.

Videl(phone): Huh? Hey! *static*

Gohan: Videl? Videl! Hey, Videl!

Vegeta: Look, I left a creditcard with them because some old hag wanted a wig, and we didn't have time to stand and make it ourselves.

Bulma(phone): YOU LEFT A CAPSULE CORP CREDIT CARD WITH COMPLETE STRANGERS! You better have that dragonball!

Vegeta: Gaaah! No, we don't have the blasted dragonball! Why else would we have made a wig for an old lady?

Bulma(phone): I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!

Kairin: We could probably hear just fine without the phone...

*Said phone explodes in Vegeta's hand...*

Tien: That didn't sound good.

Gohan: I think Videl's in trouble.

Vegeta: I'm going to get that dragonball, since apparently that woman isn't going to spray us from a pile of ash.

Goku: Awe man. What if the dragonball was destroyed with the city?

Vegeta: We won't know until we look. After that, I'm getting some answers out of that cyborg that claims he's a saiyan.

Goku: Slow down... Maybe we should find the others first?

Vegeta: You do that. *flies off*.

Gohan: Dad, I'm going with Vegeta. I think the city Videl saw might be the same one.

Goku: *sigh* be careful. I'll go check on Krillin. I'm sure Piccolo's already in on it by now.

Azuri: We'll have to go with one of you... we don't know where we are.

Goku: Huh? Well... you can go with me, I guess.

Vegeta: Well, Bulma was right.

Gohan: Weird. Hey, do you feel that?

Vegeta: I feel several things. It's confusing.

Gohan: Down there! *points to where Videl is lying face up in a pile of debris, mouth open and... looking like it was kinda painful and sudden.*

Gohan: Videl!

*Gohan lands and runs to Videl and attempts to wake her.*

Vegeta: Hmm. *Looks around*. Something's ...

*Meanwhile~!*

*Krillin, #18, Marron and Pan are sitting at a picnic table in the woods, having a picnic, with a dragonballtriumphantly tied to the back of Pan's hair, sometimes swaying in the breeze.*

Krillin: You'd think we'd've had more trouble, after all we went through in the past to find these.

Pan: Yeah; my dad told me about Namek. I wonder if we could go there some day! The new one, I mean.

Krillin: Heh heh heh. I'm not the right person to ask. Why'd you come with us instead of your parents, anyway?

Pan: I haven't seen you guys much, and that was a long time ago! I see my mom and dad all the time!

Goku: *Appears in the middle of the table*

Pan: Grandpa~!

Krillin: Jee, Goku, coul dyou try not to step in the mellon next time? I--woah! Goku... what happened to your hair?

Marron: You look like Dad did before he got married!

Goku: Uh... Sorry guys. *jumps down*. See, Vegeta lost a bet with some old lady...

#18: Usually the loser is the one to pay.

Goku: Well, she wanted a wig and...

Krillin: Should've brought me and Eighteen. We're unbeatable! ... This was cards, I hope?

Goku: Yeah, how did you know?

Krillin: How else would ... oh, never mind. What's important enough to teleport into our picnic, Goku?

Goku: Well, the city where we met that old woman has apparently been destroyed.

Pan: Destroyed?

#18: You got the dragonball? Or was that part of the bet?

Goku: Nah, we lost the dragonball. But Videl called Gohan and apparently saw that cyborg saiyan that warned us about Sir. X.

Krillin: Yeah? What'd he have to say?

Goku: I don't know. The phone stopped working then.

Krillin: Oh man...

Pan: My mom wouldn't go down that easy.

Goku: I hope not. Gohan and Vegeta went to check it out.

Krillin: Well what are we waiting for?

Goku: Well, between Yamcha and the kids, we've got three dragonballs. I came to get you guys. Dartin's been doing some sneaky things lately, but I think Tien and his student have protected the last deathcave, so we might stand a chance. And hey, I think we beat Cell!

Krillin: Cell? Awesome!

#18: Took long enough. But what about those guys that can seal rooms?

Goku: Tien and Chaozu took care of them. Wow, we've almost taken down all of them!

*Marron's phone vibrates*

Krillin: That works all the way out here?

Marron: Well, Bulma made it. *answers* Hello?

Bulma(phone): Is Vegeta with you?

Marron: No. But Goku is.

Bulma(phone): Well put him on!

Goku: You know, I think Vegeta might need my help...

Bulma(phone, which is now at Goku's head): GOKU! What's going on?

Goku: Yai! Vegeta and Gohan went to check out the city. I went to pick up Krillin's group.

Bulma(phone): Well I hope he's behaving himself, because another city is under attack!

Goku: Awe man, not another one...

Bulma(phone): Wait, it looks like three, now. ... Hey! What are you do--*scuffle*

Bulma(phone, faint): Hey! Give me that!

Piccolo(phone): Goku?

Goku: Piccolo! Hey, did you find a dragonball?

Piccolo: Yes, and last I heard the turtle hermit and his pets are close to the other. Listen, I'm pretty sure Iciicla's made her move.

Goku: Yeah? Where?

Piccolo: I don't know. Do you know what happened to that disk she stole from the kids?

Goku: No, but I dropped them off with Bulma's parents; you can ask them.

Piccolo: All I know is that there's more going on than just an alien attack. If you run into Gohan, have him meet me at the lookout. I'll be there as soon as I get a look at one of the cities that's been destroyed.

Goku: Ok. I'll go check on Master Roshi first, if that's ok.

Piccolo: Be my guest.

Krillin: Well, I guess you can drop us off at Kamehouse.

Goku: Sure thing.

Piccolo(phone): And Goku...

Goku: Yeah?

Piccolo(phone): Are you sure that Cell's gone for good?

Goku: Don't worry. He fell into a deathcave and Gohan finished him. Dartin even tried to grab that energy he tried to steal from Elanmak, but it made him sick or something, 'cause he got sent away pretty quickly after that.

Piccolo(phone): I think the playground is about to answer a few questions. Good luck, Goku.

*Heh.*

Kairin: THe disk was broken. We haven't been able to fix it.

Piccolo: Do you remember what was on it?

Kairin: I think it was just a slideshow game thing I made. I have copies of the files...

Piccolo: Are you absolutely sure that's all that was on it?

Kairin: I ... think so.

Piccolo: And they didn't take any other disks?

Kairin: I didn't notice any that were missing.

Piccolo: Could anything else have been on it?

Kairin: I think it was rewritable, so maybe there was something I missed. But our computer was kinda wiped before that... I don't think we used any other disks before that one. It would have been something from ... around the time the Darklings came out? Actually, probably before that, even.

Piccolo: Hmmph. All right. *flies off*

*In a submarine*

*Goku, Pan, Krillin, #18 and Marron appear*

Roshi: Hey! Give a guy some warning, will you?

Goku: Sorry about that, Master Roshi.

Oolong: You'd better be! Now the submarine is sinking!

Goku: Wah! Do you have the dragonball?

Roshi: Yes. And it cost me a whole shelf of magazines to get this lazy pig to turn into a lobster and grab it.

Oolong: Hey, there were sharks out there!

Pan: Do sharks eat lobsters?

Puar: The submarine is sinking~!

Goku: Ok... Krillin, Eighteen, let's say hi to Seaturtle. *BAMF*

Krillin: Jees, what a mess. Do we even know what's happening?

Goku: Hmm.

Umigame: You can use the TV, if you need to.

#18: I'd hope so, since we live here.

*elsewhere...*

*Some smoke clears to reveal Piccolo scanning some broken buildings.*

Piccolo: Whoever it was, they're still here.

Elohssa: A Namekian?

Piccolo: Elohssa, I take it?

Elohssa: An ally of Goku, I see.

Piccolo: You were spotted at another destroyed city. And now, you're the first person I find here.

Elohssa: I thought the defenders of this planet would have heeded my warning, but it looks like I'm going to have to chase Sir. X on my own.

Piccolo: If there even is a Sir. X.

Elohssa: I thought Namekians were adept seers, but I guess the rumors were false.

Piccolo: *holds up a hand in a ready position*. Where is he, then?

Elohssa: What do your senses tell you?

Piccolo: That giving you the benefit of the doubt is dangerous. *Purple sparks shoot from Piccolo's antennae, but Elohssa's hair whips forward and intercepts, spreading into a... well... cool-looking net of intertangling sparks and redness.*

Elohssa:*pulls back, his hair returning to a whip-like shape*. That was foolish.

Piccolo: You're coming with me.

Elohssa: I have better things to do. *Eyebeam*.

Piccolo: *slaps the bolt aside, but Elohssa backflips out of range of the counter attack.*

*Piccolo extends his arms to grab Elohssa's leg, but is shocked in the process. Elohssaraises himself with one foot on the ground and points at Piccolo.*

Elohssa: Deathray! *The blast causes Piccolo to release him, but does little in the way of damage.*

Piccolo: *Eyebeams*

Elohssa: *Blocks with his hair, causing the blast to explode. He is still thrown back, but relatively unharmed.*

*Back at the first city...*

Gohan: Videl... wake up.

Videl: Go... han?

Vegeta: There are others here.

Gohan: Hm. Yeah, I think I feel it too. Videl?

Videl: I'm... sorry.

Gohan: What happened?

Videl: I don't remember. I remember that ... cyborg with the eye and the hair whip thing and...

Vegeta: *walks off*

*A couple four-armed monkey-octapus-things jump back from a relatively tall stack of broken metal and debris, clutching their faces in pain.*

Vegeta: What are you?

*One of the creatures waves its arm and starts to yell something, but Vegeta's fist silences it.*

Vegeta: You'll answer me.

Dauq: You weaklings can't handle an old proon with a broken hip?

Vegeta: What?

Obaasan: You want some too, four-arms?

Vegeta: Hah hah hah hah hah hah! I don't even need to fight.

*the two creatures near Vegeta cower in fear.*

Dauq: What was that?

*A taller, more humanoid--in posture, anyway--four-armed creature emerges from the shadows.*

Vegeta: Are you the boss?

Dauq: I am a general of Sir. X! Surrender immediately!

Vegeta: Sir. X? That tub of lard has started recruiting trash like you? Even with Freeza out of the way, the loser is desperate. Hahahaha!

Dauq: Silence, fool! *Fire surrounds him* No one mocks the illustrious Sir. X! *All of that fire rages toward Vegeta*.

Vegeta: I hope that's not all.

Dauq: You insolent...

Vegeta: *Blasts Dauq's head off*.

*The other two cower, and prepare to run.*

Vegeta: Tell me where Sir. X is, and I might let you go.

*they run for it.*

*Vegeta catches them*.

Vegeta: No talking?

*They try to run again, but Vegeta zips in front again.*

Vegeta: Maybe I wasn't clear enough. *incinerates an arm of one of them* WHERE IS SIR. X!

*One of them indicates the north*.

Vegeta: That's better. *He grabs both of them and throws them into the distance*.

Obaasan: Oh, it's you again, eh?

Vegeta: What?

*The old lady hobbles out, supporting herself with a broken metal beam. A vibrant yellow Goku wig is afixed to her head.*

Obaasan: We had a deal; you lost!

Vegeta: Do you mean to tell me that this entire city was destroyed, and you are still hobbling around spraying people in the face?

Obaasan: That's right! Not the first exploding building I've been in.

Vegeta: Look, you saw the aliens yourself. Why don't you hand over the blasted dragonball and be done with it?

Obaasan: Don't make me use this! *waves pepperspray threateningly*.

Gohan: Vegeta? What's going on?

Vegeta: I ran into Sir. X's people harrassing a surviver. I made the mistake of getting rid of them.

Videl: Jee, ma'am, are you ok?

Obaasan: I'm just fine!

Videl: My father has plenty of money; maybe we can cover that hip for you?

Obaasan: What's in it for you, eh, pigtails?

Videl: I was trying to be helpful!

Vegeta: She has the dragonball.

Gohan: Is that dad's hair?

Obaasan: What about it?

Gohan: Nothing. It ... uh... looks good on you.

Videl: *glares at Gohan*.

Obaasan: Flattery won't get you anywhere with me.

Videl: Well fine. Maybe you'd like to hobble around for what's left of your life.

Obaasan: Sassy, eh? All right, I'll give you the ball. After I get my new hip.

Vegeta: *facepalm*.

*Kamehouse.*

Reporter(cont, TV): ... Strange creatures seen, according to witness reports. While most reports indicate that the mysterious army are spreading outward from the intial attack areas, some reports of inexplicable disruption are coming on from further to the west.

Krillin: Woah, big deal. These guys aren't too strong, though.

#18: Are you sure?

Goku: Krillin's right. a lot of them are stronger than most people, but they're not that impressive.

Krillin: They're still doing damage, though.

Goku: Hmm. Do you sense Piccolo?

Krillin: Hmm? Ah, yeah, but who's he fighting?

Goku: I'm not sure, but I think it's ...

*Meanwhile, at capsule corp...*

Bulma's Mama: Maybe we should turn on the radio. If those strange explosions get too close, we might need to move the display cars to the hoverlot!

Trunks: Grandma, what are they doing?

Bulma's Mama: So much I can't really tell.

Dr. Breef: Let's just use the remote. *turns up the volume on some speakers or something*.

Reporter(cont, radio): ... engaging outside of Kosbata Town. Another group of creatures, this one apparently of multiple images, appears to be cutting a path toward Satan City, though they are taking their time. It is believed the attackers are trying to secure resource lines, but they are so swift and efficient in their advance that noone can get close enough to confirm the details.

Goten: Wow, they're moving fast!

Kairin: I guess Sir. X has gotten here.

Reporter(cont, radio): We're receiving word that Mr. Satan is prepared to defend Satan City, with support from his most trusted disciple. The champion has not commented on involvement from the Great Saiyaman, but has urged the local authorities to concentrate on alternate ways into the city. While just two men against an army that has flattened at least four cities seems impossible, the Satan City authorities are confident that their city is in capable hands.

Kairin: Heh.

Goten: You think they can handle it? Gohan is still out at the first city...

Trunks: Buu will help, don't worry.

Reporter(cont, radio): Reports from Gachukko town are more confusing.

Kairin: What?

Kejek: Wait, I thought they were spreading out from other places...

Kairin: Maybe they're just trying to throw us off?

Kejek: Hmm.

Dr. Breef: That is odd. Gachukko town is in a very valuable region. Surely they would take the river near there.

Reporter(cont, radio): Local militias are guarding the river, but there are no signs of invasion from that direction. While more reports are getting out, less witnesses have seen the attackers than from previous reports.

Goten: I wonder if these guys are ninjas...

Kejek: Not the ones we saw in space.

Kairin: We should do something...

Katar: Well, do you think the porter has enough power to move us?

Kejek: It might be able to carry two people.

Kairin: Well that just means...

Kejek: Or one person two ways.

Trunks: We can just fly.

Katar: Maybe we should save the porter if we need to get away.

Kejek: *sigh*.

*Lalalalala, ruined city....*

Gohan: I don't mean to be a bother, but it would be really helpful if you could tell us more about the attack...

Obaasan: I've told you everything. Loser-troll ran off as soon as they started putting my wig together. As soon as I put it on, the building started moving. One way, the next... Snapped back, like they took the top right off of it like a stick of wood. And not the soggy kind that wasps eat out of... *Continues...*

Piccolo(telepathy): Gohan!

Gohan: Huh?

Obaasan: I said like a slide! And a fast one! But not the best I've seen. There was one...

Piccolo(telepathy): Someone's trying to escape. I might need help covering him.

Obaasan(cont): ... but their food was horrible.

Gohan: Uh... Excuse me, but I've got to...

Obaasan: What was that?

Gohan: Um, bye! *flies off*.

Vegeta: Are you just leaving ... u... *groan*.

Videl: Gohan...!

Obaasan: Bah! Think you're fancy, do you? Aeh... where was I?

*Forest of piles of broken buildings and rubble.*

Elohssa: *Flying through the mess*. The Namekian would be useful if he'd pay better attention.

Piccolo: *Blasts through a pile of rubble, knocking Elohssa into another.* Hold still.

Elohssa: I tried that. Why don't you look t othe northeast?

Piccolo: I will, as soon as I know I don't have a sneaking cyborg to worry about.

Elohssa: Then follow me. *Tries to fly away*

Piccolo: Hold on. *intercepts, but not without some quick clashing of arms*. Not so fast. You'll stay right here for now.

Elohssa: Very well. What do your senses tell you?

Piccolo: Hmm. So you aren't working alone.

Elohssa: Unfortunately, I am. Can you detect the strongest among them?

Piccolo: Hmm.

Gohan: Piccolo?

Elohssa: Backup?

Piccolo: Darn, they're on the move...

Elohssa: Believe me now?

Gohan: Piccolo! Is everything working, now that I've come all the way...

Goku: *BAMF* Hey! What's going on, here?

Elohssa: Diversion, apparently. While we sit here arguing, Sir. X is conquering this world. The more he destroys, the better the odds he'll notice us before we can ambush him. And I'm sure the rest of the life on this planet would appreciate intervention.

Goku: Hmm. Sir. X. Which one is he?

Elohssa: I wasn't aware that the rest of you'd developed the ability to sense energy unaided. Did the Namekian teach you?

Goku: Not exactly...

Gohan: Well, kinda...

Goku: Ah, I think I've got the strongest. Well, let's go!

*Goku grabs Gohan and Piccolo, the latter of which is holding onto Elohssa. And behold: teleportation.*

Eborana: What is this?

Sir. X: Latecomers.

Eborana: But noone on this planet has displayed the ability to teleport.

Elohssa: *Eyebeams Sir. X.*

Sir. X: *blocks Vader-style.*

Eborana: Fool! You dare attack the illustrious Sir. X? You haven't earned the right to face me, but a lowly general!

Goku: Eh, I don't know. You look like Freeza, but I'd rather go for the most challenging one.

Eborana: Ignorant fool!

Sir. X: Calm yourself, Eborana. Take a team to sweep the sea to the southeast.

Piccolo: Not so fast.

Sir. X: *Telekinetically pens Piccolo's arms to his side*. I'll deal with these.

Eborana: Yes, Sir. *Flies away*.

Elohssa: *eyebeams Eborana, but Sir. X tosses a piece of debris in the way.*

Gohan: The sea... Kamehouse?

Goku: I think Krillin and Eighteen can handle them.

Sir. X: You overestimate your chances.

Piccolo: *Materializes a small rock that falls on Sir. X's head.*

Goku: Hmm. Piccolo, you want to go first?

Elohssa: Even if he can win, Sir. X is a master of tactics. Teamwork is our advantage.

Sir. X: *hurls a chunk of debris at Elohssa, but it halts in front of him.*

Gohan: Did you do that?

Elohssa: **Jumps*.

*The object explodes in a massive... explosion. That's... yeah.*

Gohan: Awe, jees... what was that? *Gets out of a pile of debris.*

Piccolo: He converted that entire mass into energy.

Goku: What?

Gohan: Ah, like nuclear fusion!

Elohssa: Extremely efficient nuclear fusion.

Goku: Hmm. I'll bet that armor protects Sir. X from his own explosions.

Elohssa: That would be correct. It isn't his prefered outfit.

Piccolo: Then we should aim for his head.

Sir. X: Your bodies explode as well as a rock. Your survival is dependent on your beating me before I lose patience.

Gohan: Hmm.

Goku: All right then, let's make this interesting. *SSJ*

Elohssa: Hmm. So this is the legendary Super Saiyan. I was expecting a less cosmetic transformation.

*(Remember, everyone... Goku's hair hasn't grown back yet. :P. )*

Sir. X: Super... Saiyan?

Goku: That's right. So let's see what you've got. *kicks*.

*Sir. X slides backward, but doesn't leave the ground.*

Goku: Heh, nice armor!

Sir. X: Enough. *A ring of energy forms around him like an aura, then flies at Goku. Goku dodges the ring entirely, and it spins out of existence.*

Goku: I hope that wasn't supposed to be a trap. I've seen those before.

Sir. X: Not quite. *Another ring forms, but this time it extends rather than leavves, forming a tunnel of energy.*

Goku: Wah! *Dodges*.

Gohan: Woah, watch it! *dodges*.

Piccolo: *Blasts into the tunnel as the opening advances toward him*.

*The blast is deflected off of Sir. X's defenses and bounces out of the tunnel laser-deflection-pingpong-ly, forcing Piccolo to dodge on the ground, which subsequently explodes.*

Elohssa: *Flies above the tunnel and fires an eye-bolt toward Sir. X's head, but a piece of a bullet-train flies up to knock Elohssa aside.*

Goku: Hey, not bad!

Sir. X: Even the one that thought he could attack my tank didn't last this long.

*On the edge of a shadowy construction-site-type place... except there's not so much structure and a lot of ... really big holes...*

Iciicla: No sign of it! Do you think it unreasonable that I call your work into question?

Zalantar: I told you everything... exactly as it was given to me!

Iciicla: Perhaps we'll have to find your source and find another way to get information from him.

Zalantar: He won't...

Iciicla: Are you contradicting me, girl?

Zalantar: He's dealt with tricks before... he'll go quiet if you try to force him...

Iciicla: You knew him for minutes and you're protecting him? Are all humans this weak?

Zalantar: That's not...

Iciicla: Ginyu! Are my gates opened, yet?

Ginyu(scouter): They're working on it. A couple warriors are still resisting.

Iciicla: Tag them. Make sure that your men aren't slacking off. I want... *scouter blip*. Ah, someone's coming.

Ginyu: It will only be minutes.

Iciicla: You, in the box.

Zalantar: What? But we...

Iciicla: The weak ones are coming. Not threatening to me, but I don't want them finding you.

Zalantar: But you said...

Iciicla: *toe-to-face-jab*.

*Somewhere with direction...*

Trunks: Something seems wrong. Like something is messing with my senses.

Azuri: You too?

Goten: Hey, what's that?

Trunks: Huh?

*BLAST'D!*

Trunks: What was that?

Goten: Down there, by that.... Cloud... dish... thing?

*More blasts*

Trunks: *deflects a bunch of blasts*. Maybe someone should tell them they're wasting their energy...

Goten: Hey! You're wasting your energy!

Trunks: ... Thanks, Goten.

*Copper dart flies between Goten and Trunks*.

Goten: It worked, didn't it?

Trunks: What was that?

*Another dart*

Goten: *Tries to catch it* *misses* Woah...

Azuri: *Catches*. A dart.

Trunks: Blasts don't work, so they throw darts? What could they have on them?

Goten: Trunkslookout! *punches a dart*.

Trunks: Maybe we should land...

*Dart-storm!*

Goten: Yeah! *They land.*

Trunks: Azuri, you might want to be careful with that...

Azuri: *Pockets dart*. Who threw it?

Trunks: Might've been Sir. X's people.

Goten: I don't know...

Azuri: I think they're behind that building.

Trunks: Looks more like a construction site.

Goten: Maybe we can sneak up on them from there?

Trunks: I wouldn't be surprised if they're using it for something.

*Dart strikes the ground between them hard enough that it disappears behind a cloud of dust.*

*Mean-mean-while...*

*So at Kamehouse, Eborana talks smack, Krillin and #18 decimate, and all ends well.*

*Somewhere else...*

Mr. Satan: All right. Our amazing defenses are all ready. *Does stretches?*. Now we just wait for those up-start aliens to show up...

Buu: Buu hear something!

Mr. Satan: Is it them?

Tolhe: Psst. You're gonna die.

Mr. Satan: What?

Tolhe: *Tail-stab at Mr. Satan's back, but Buu catches it.*

Mr. Satan: Oh, sneak up behind us, eh? Well, that is the only smart way to approach the world champion!

Tolhe: *Ki blast*.

Mr. Satan: Weugh! *narrow dodge*.

Buu: *throws Tolhe into the distance.*

Mr. Satan: Nice work, Buu. That'll teach 'em...

*at least ten more Freeza-like and tall dark guys in red appear on the edge of the city.*

Elxum: Fire!

Mr. Satan: Not so fast! Buu, defense!

Buu: *Jumps into the air and takes a storm of blasts in the stomach.*

Mr. Satan: You'll have to do better than that to seige my fine city!

Elxum: Somebody get rid of that pink thing.

*A couple of the attackers fly at Buu, who takes some attacks before flicking them to the ground.*

Mr. Satan: Yeah, how about that? *beats up the closest invader.*

Elxum: Enough of that. *His fist glows red, and a nearby sign explodes in a collumn of smoke and fire.*

Mr. Satan: Weugh! Heh, heh, nice trick, but it's not enough! Buu, let's send these guys back where they came from!

Buu: Ok! *Stretches arms and antennae to wrap around most of the invaders, flies high into the sky and flings them all upward.*

Elxum: W... What the....? Even the brats on Nickatodeo didn't pull a stunt like that...

Mr. Satan: That's right. So why don't you just surrender now?

Elxum: Surrender? Me? I'm the general that stopped the civil war when Sir. X came to power. No pink bubblegum can stop me!

Mr. Satan: Oh, yeah? How about the world's champion of martial arts? ... Ugh, what am I saying?

Elxum: Who's that, you? Hah! I'm tired of this. *Both fists glow red, then Elxum explodes in a ball of flame.*

Mr. Satan: ... Uh. Hahahahaha! Oh yeah, behold my mighty power!

Videl: Dad? What are you doing out here?

Mr. Satan: Defending my city; what does it look like?

Vegeta:*lands*. Ponytailed freak let his guard down.

Mr. Satan: That wasn't Buu?

Buu: *lands*. Bunnies~!

Obaasan: What're we stopping for?

Mr. Satan: Who's this?

Videl: A surviver from the first city that was hit. She has a broken hip.

Mr. Satan: Broken... hip?

Videl: Yes. And we promised her a replacement.

Mr. Satan: For free?

Videl: Not exactly...

*A few thousand feet above...*

Tolhe: Sir. X isn't going to like this... *notices that the not-Freeza's race people are freaking out due to lack of oxygen.*. ... *sigh*. We'll need a transport...

*Meanwhile, at the "fight" with Sir. X.*

Elohssa: *Notices a ship taking off*. A ship... that means...

Piccolo: *Flies up and blasts through the ship.*.

Elohssa: ... That the fleet is parked where it came from.

Sir. X: *Focuses on Piccolo* Not clever enough.

Gohan: *Punches Sir. X off of his feet.*.

*Meanwhile, back with the OCs...*

Shairo: Why are those trees on fire?

Katar: We just got here...

Kejek: *Aims wand at the blaze and water shoots out, though it's not much.*

*An Elephant walks up and dumps water on the blaze*.

Shairo: Elephant~!

Katar: Is that... normal, here?

Kejek: Not... usually.

*The elephant shoves a rock onto a piece of the fire.*

Kairin: Is that...

Katar: You know that?

Kairin: I... don't know. (Louder) At? L--

*The elephant looks, then turns and stomps off into the distance.*

Kairin: Hey, wait!

At(Telepathy): Computer lab.

Kairin: Wait!

Katar: Hey, what's going on?

At(telepathy): Come alone.

Kairin: ... *sigh*. Stay here..

Kejek: Hey.

Kairin: What?

Kejek: *Holds out a gold coin*. Don't keep this one in a golfclub.

Kairin: O...K.

Shairo: Where are you going?

Kairin: Sorry, can't say yet. *runs off*.

Katar: What are you standing here for?

Kejek: Wait!

Katar: Why?

Kejek: He went alone for a reason.

*Something explodes not too far away*.

Katar: And I'll go alone if I have to. *runs off toward the source of the explosion*.

Kejek: Yeah, let's run toward the thing that blows up cities. ... *Follows, not quite so quickly*.

*Satan City?*

Vegeta: How long is this going to take?

Doctor: Hip replacement can be a complicated proceedure. It'll be days before we can be sure everything is working correctly.

Vegeta: Guh. I'll be killing aliens, if anyone needs me.

Videl: Wait!

Vegeta: *flies off*

Videl: ... *sigh*. Gohan... Pan...

Buu: Buu hungry!

Mr. Satan: Well, if I'm paying for this lady's hip, we'll have to shop smart today.

Buu: Shop Smart?

Mr. Satan: We'll have to be more selective about what we eat. Just today.

Videl: I want to go find Pan.

Buu: Pan? Does Pan have food?

Videl: Maybe, if she's not in trouble.

Mr. Satan: If this city didn't need protecting...

Videl: ... *sigh*. Ok. I'll hang back a bit. Call me if you find her, ok? I'll get a new phone in the mean time.

Mr. Satan: ... Videl? I know you want to go...

Videl: I can fly. You'll go faster with Buu. Just don't let anything happen to Pan, all right?

Mr. Satan: You've got it. Come on, Buu!

*And they fly off*.

*Elsewhere. *

Chaozu: Tien... Something strange is happening.

Tien: I know. But what?

Vekin I think Docho Shini is acting strange.

Tien: But how? Dartin is still hiding somewhere. Jaavan?

Vekin: Hmm. Hey, did you get that book off of those crooks that were with Cell?

Tien: Book? No.

Vekin: We probably should get it.

Tien: We should make sure that Docho Shini isn't being abused.

Chaozu: I'll get the book. *Flies off*.

*A couple of parked Sir. X ships explode.*

Sque: Look who it is, the saiyan with an eyeball for a head. And a Namekian.

Etchi: Our fleet was rationed for our trips after we're done here. Now we'll have to build things with this planet's resources!

Piccolo: I'll save you the trouble. *blasts a hole through Etchi's chest.*

*Sque lunges* *Elohssa hair-whips him out of the attack, then drives a foot into his chest. Then blasts other soldiers while standing sideways in Sque's chest-cavity.*

*Buu flies over Goku and Gohan Vs. Sir. X.*

Sir. X: What was that?

Goku(Still bald, guys...): I'll bet it was Buu.

Gohan: *flies up after Buu*. Hey!

Mr. Satan: Huh? Gohan?

Gohan: Have you heard from Videl?

Mr. Satan: Yeah; she's in Satan City. We're going to find Pan.

Gohan: I think Dad left her with Krillin at Kamehouse.

Mr. Satan: You hear that, Buu?

Vegeta: *Flies in*. What's taking so long, Kakarot?

Goku: Oh, hey, Vegeta.

Gohan: I'm going to go join Videl, if you can handle this.

Vegeta: Go on.

Sir. X: Do you really think that's all it takes? *Energy Ring forms around him.*

Goku: Not so fast! *blasts*.

Sir. X: *fires the ring into the ground, creating a barier that deflects Goku's attack.*

Vegeta: * Flies behind Sir. X, only to be blocked by a flying chunk of metal.*

*An energy tunnel blasts up from the ground, surrounding Goku.*

Sir. X: There is no escape, this time.

Goku: Huh? *flies upward*.

Sir. X: *drops a car on top of the tube* *Then converts much of the mater in the tube into energy, creating an explosion that forces out the top in an awesomely-colored blue-violet-green ray of light that extends as far as the eye can see into the sky.*

Sir. X: All too easy. Now...

Vegeta: What? Do you think the same trick will work on me?

Sir. X: Will it?

Vegeta: Not a chance.

Goku: *Elbow's Sir. X in the back, causing him to stumble forward; his armor, however, is unphased.*

Sir. X: What?

Goku: I just teleported out. You should pay more attention.

Sir. X: Fine. *Starts causing giant explosions from the ground, which Goku and Vegeta easily dodge.*

*Goku flies in to attack Sir. X, who flies upward as he sets off a nuclear-ish explosion in the air below Goku*.

Vegeta: *Flies up to intercept Sir. X, who keeps flying higher and backward to avoid too close an encounter. Vegeta lets loose a blast, but Sir.X deflects most of it via telekinesis and his armor.*

Goku: Man, that wasn't half bad...

Vegeta: This is ridiculous. Let's just vaporize him and be done with it.

Goku: Already? Ah, I guess we should.

*They both fly at Sir. X and power up...*

Sir. X: Enough. *explodes the atoms in the air around Goku and Vegeta.*

Goku: *Teleports behind Sir. X*.

Sir. X: *explodes the atoms in Goku'sbody*

Goku: WAAAH! *Falls to the ground in a bloody mess.*

Vegeta: *Blasts Sir. X, sending him flying.*

Goku: Wow... that.... hurt.

Vegeta: If we'd both taken him head on, we could have finished him.

Goku: Sorry. I thought he'd try something...

Vegeta: You already did that once. I thought you were smarter than that, Kakarot.

Goku: Heh. It was worth a try. Hey, we know how he fights, right?

Vegeta: Get yourself to Dende. I'll handle him.

*Dadada, darkened construction site-esque place with enough roofing/walling to provide darkness.*

Lady(near a "doorway"): Still nothing?

Lingo(OS): No. I think those people we saw are hiding nearby.

Lady: Work quickly!

Goten: What are they looking for?

Trunks: How should we know?

Lingo(OS): I think I heard something.

Lady: Be quick.

Goten: Oopse.

Trunks: Let's go out the back...

Zalantar(OS, in a small space): This way.

Azuri: What was that?

Trunks: Let's be careful, this time.

Zalantar: This room...

Goten: Someone's in there.

Azuri: Is there a way in?

Trunks: Hmm.

Zalantar: It's locked...

Trunks: *pulls a door out of the wall.* Sure about that?

Iciicla: Good.

Goten: Ah! It's that Freeza lady...

Zalantar: But...

Trunks: Goten, get her out of there. Let's go!

*they rune across to another doorway on the side where Lingo and the lady were, and dart out until another opening shows up.*

Iciicla: Lingo, go.

Lady: Zalantar?

Zalantar: In here!

Trunks: You'll give us away!

*A Namekian shadow appears from another doorway.*

Lingo: Fresh meat...

Azuri: *Stirs up dust to obscure how easy they are to see.*

Goten: Hey! I was starting to smell something...

Trunks: Yeah. Come on!

*They run through a narrow opening in a wall into another dark room.*

Azuri: We can't keep this up for long.

Trunks: That girl, and now a Namekian... What's going on?

Kejek: *Fires a stunbolt into the room*

Trunks: Wha!

Kejek: Now's your chance.

*They ... run out the back.*

Trunks: Do you have any idea what all of this is about?

Katar: Not at all. Kairin went off to meet an elephant, and doesn't want us following. So we followed the noise instead.

Iciicla(OS): Fools! Don't let them escape! Do I have to do everything myself?

Shairo: Iciicla!

Kejek: Wait, was that girl...?

Shairo: Zalantar?

Kejek: No wonder Kairin's lead wanted to go alone.

Goten: What do you mean?

Katar: Mind rubnning before we talk?

Lingo(OS): I hear them...

Kejek: *points his wand at a rock and it turns into a toad*. Let's leave them something to hear.

Goten: *Picks up the toad*. You want me to...

Lingo: Aha!

Goten: *throws toad*.

Azuri: *Duststorm*.

Trunks: Go!

*And everyone runs*.

Kejek(still running): I think they've got some kind of mind control. Or at least something that lets Iciicla keep up with people.

Trunks: Or the girl and her family joined her willingly.

Kejek: I don't think that Namekian did, though. So either that Elephant was Iciicla's, or it knows and wants to make sure we aren't.

Goten: Let's just hope it's the second one...

*Teenage Mutant Ninja Nameks show up. With... coppery faces?*

Azuri: Hey, I'll bet that's what those darts were for!

Katar: So we rip their faces off?

Goten: That'd hurt...

*Zombie Namekian Attack!*

*scramblyness as everyone ... ur... reacts rather foolishly, to the amusement of the audience.*

*Ext. Docho Shini - probably day.*

Tien: Strange. I knew strange things had been done to overcome death, but this...

Vekin: What is it? It's like there's another presence, but I can't tell where it is...

Tien: That's because it isn't here. It's connected to something far away, on another planet.

Vekin: What does that mean? Are they going to open a portal between the planets?

Tien: I can't tell. This could be crossing the whole universe...

Vekin: Hey, wait... Jaavan showed us Buu flying into the universe after a huge clump of stars disappeared, and some pirate guy from a planet he destroyed was trying to ... ...

Tien: How many planets?

Vekin: There were four, but only one survived...

Tien: That might mean...

Chaozu(telepathy): Tien, I've got the book.

Tien: Good work, Chaozu.

Chaozu(TelepathY): But... Something's wrong...

Tien: What?

*Lalalala....

Tellia(Namekian): That's enough. *Knocks out Chaozu with a chop to the neck.* *Takes the book*. *Flies away*.

Tien: Chaozu? Chaozu? Chaozu!

Vekin: ... What... happened?

Tien: Find the others, quick! *Flies off*.

Vekin: Where are you going? ...

*After some Sir. X soldiers fall to the ground in dismembered pieces...*

Vekin: Piccolo?

Piccolo: What?

Vekin: Master Tien went off.. and said... to find someone. I think something happened to Chaozu while he was going to get the book that the crooks with the darklings had...

Piccolo: Slow down. Hmm...

Vekin: Don't you sense that...

Piccolo: ... Hmm.

Vekin: It's like the death-caves ... like the cave of docho shini is connected to one on another planet.

Piccolo: That's it!

Vekin: Huh?

Piccolo: *flies off in a hurry*.

Vekin: Hey, wait up! *Tries to follow*.

*Dadada, meanwhile...*

Kairin: Hmm. Door's locked? *Uses quad-blade to get in*.

Some Woman: Hey! Who gave you permission to go wherever you want?

Kairin: *shrug*. Did someone deny it?

Some Woman: Just like men, thinking everything is given...

Kairin: Hey, who are you calling men? *looks down* though... the ground is far away. T.T

Katar: Hey!

Some Woman: Yes?

Kairin: *ninjas inside*.

*a bug jumps off of a waterfountain and follows him.*

Kairin: At?

At(telepathy): Computer lab.

Kairin: It's... locked.

*The bug disappears under the door*.

*Kairin tries the door*. *Then gets out quad-blade, but the door opens, revealing a shorter blond-haired boy in a lime-green shirt*.

Kairin: At!

At: Shh. *pulls Kairin inside and shuts the door.*

Kairin: Jees, what happened here?

At: At first I thought it was our old friends returned. But... I don't think so.

Kairin: Yeah... there's something strange out there.

At: They got to Loranar. But they didn't come after me. Unless that's you.

Kairin: well... I... can't prove anything...

At: I know. But if it's just you, I can probably get away.

Kairin: Jee, thanks...

At: They're looking for something, and I think they know someone here knows about it.

Kairin: Any idea what it could be?

At: Well, maybe... You remember those stories we heard about Elumatsu?

Kairin: The guy that can freeze time?

At: Well, they say he made something. Some kind of machine that...

*Thunder?*

Kairin: What was...

*Freeza appears!*

Freeza: I've had enough of this.

Kairin: Not again...

Piccolo: *Appears*. As have I. *slaps Freeza through a wall*.

Kairin: What's...

Piccolo: Outside! Now!

Kairin: *runs...*

*Meanwhile, somewhere stagnant...*

Vegeta: ... Freeza? Not again...

Sir. X: What? Are you trying to trick me?

Vegeta: You tell me. *blasts Sir. X into the ground and flies off*.

*And... someone shoots Buu out of the air? ! *

Mr. Satan: Waoh! What the... heck just happened?

Buu: Someone make boom!

Tellia: *Disappears from sight*.

Vekin: ... Huh?

Gohan: What's going on? Sir. X's army?

Vekin: I... don't think so.

Gohan: If Piccolo hadn't ran off like that...

Lady: Someone's this way.

Vekin: Wait, who's that?

*A big dog comes running*

Buu: Doggy!

Mr. Satan: Watch it, Buu; that dog doesn't look friendly.

*The dog jumps at Vekin, but Gohan lightly blasts it aside.*

Iciicla: Enough of this...

Gohan: She's back? *sigh*.

*Goten and Trunks blast Iciicla into a sand dune*.

Goten: Gohan! She's got Namekmen under her control!

Gohan: What?

Trunks: They threw some darts at us; Azuri's running one back to my mom.

Lingo: *holds up Zalantar*. Yummy...

Gohan: What? Hey! Put her down!

Iciicla: You help me first!

Trunks: It's a trick! She's--

Iciicla: *Deathbeams Trunks in the face.*. *Then blasts a lot of sand into the air*.

Mr. Satan: Grr. Hey! Over grown cucumber! Put that girl down now, or you'll have to deal with ... Us!

Iciicla: Lingo, show them we mean business!

Lingo: *bites down on Zalantar's arm, to which she screams*.

Lady: You weren't going to hurt her!

Iciicla: Silence!

*Lingo is blasted, and goes flying, dropping Zalantar in the process.*

Shairo: Stay away from her!

Kejek: *runs over to Zalantar and tries to close her wound.*

Buu: *Hops over and heals Zalantar*.

*A shadowy figure approaches, surrounded in a cloud of darkness.*

Mr. Satan: Awe great, what's that?

Kairin: Dragonfly Attack! *blasts Iciicla; the shadows fade to reveal Kairin.*

Goten: How'd you do that shadow thing?

Kairin: I was drawing on the light.

Iciicla: Weak fools... You have no idea what you're dealing with. *She starts to bulge as though to transform, but is obscured in sand*.

Gohan: Watch out; she's going to use her poison quills...

Kejek: No she's not. She may be pretty solid, but she's still a ghost.

Iciicla(distorted): Don't be so sure.

Gohan: *Blasts into the dust*

Kairin: Freeza's back.

Gohan: ... Again? ... Are you sure?

Kairin: Piccolo was fighting him, last I saw.

Gohan: Well, I think Piccolo can handle Freeza.

Iciicla: You are naive. Haven't you realized by now that strength is not the key to victory?

Gohan: What do you have planned?

Iciicla: Lingo!

*Lingo and some other Namekian zombies pop up out of the sand and try to grab people.*

*Most everyone fights, though Mr. Satan's opponent isn't taking a lot of damage.*

Kairin: *Circles the battlefield to Buu's side*. Vekin!

*Vekin is a bit busy with a zombie Namekian*

Buu: Which one is Vekin?

Kairin: Umm, he's about my size, but not the one with the wand?

Buu: *stretches out an arm and grabs Vekin*.

*The Namekian Vekin was fighting looks around and faces Buu, who spits at him, knocking him into another sand-dune.*

Buu: Here he is. *Sets Vekin down*.

Kairin: Umm... Thanks.

Vekin: What was that for?

At: *steps out from behind Buu*.

Vekin: At?

At: Vekin... Do you remember what we heard about Elumatsu?

Vekin: Was that the guy that could freeze time?

At: Let's get going while there's still time...

Vekin: Going? Where? What are we doing?

Kairin: Iciicla apparently got to Loranar.

At: It was that girl.

Kairin: Zalantar?

At: Mm. Iciicla's been secretly damaging crops to force people off their land. She even hired people to bulldose the land, and lots of houses have been damaged.

Vekin: But she can just destroy it all herself.

Kairin: Yeah, but then the Saiyans would have noticed.

Vekin: So she's going all out now because she thought they wouldn't notice with Sir. X attacking?

At: I don't know. But whatever they're looking for, I think they're getting close. And I think we should be worried.

Vekin: Wait, do you think she knows about the Time Matrix?

Kairin: !

At: Maybe.

Kairin: How did she know it was here?

Vekin: Maybe ... Maybe some of Sir. X's people we fought in space knew about what we did before you went to magic school?

Kairin: But Iciicla isn't with Sir. X...

Vekin: Hey! Was there anything on that disk she had stolen?

Kairin: Huh? AH! That has to be it! We had pictures of Gachukko town... that must be how she knew to look here!

Lady(OS): They're getting away.

*In the sky...*

Tellia: Persistent. But he can't catch me.

Tien: Hey! Stop!

Tellia: *Charges energy into his elbows and blasts out the back of his arms, accelerating in the process*.

Tien: Fine; let's see just how fast you are. *Speeds up*.

Tellia: *Suddenly arches upward and disappears*.

Tien: Huh? Don't tell me he teleported. *stops*. No... It's that connection to the cave. That has to be it.

*Piccolo Vs. Freeza.*

Piccolo: How many times have you lost only to come back like you stand a chance?

Freeza: This makes four, I think. Though we did have an interesting disco party in Hell one time...

Piccolo: Why haven't you been cleansed and reincarnated? You were dead for nearly thirteen years!

Freeza: Ah, yes, that. Well, it turns out that there is some substance to these bizarre spiritual things of Namek and even this planet. I had a faithful servant who learned a few of the three-eyeds' tricks and used them to bind me to this world. I have to appologize for my mother; her tactics are a bit confusing. But now that I've caught on, I can confidently say that you should consider yourself doomed.

Vegeta:*grabs Freeza by the throat*. Doom this. *Throws Freeza into the sky and blasts him out of sight*.

Piccolo: You know he'll come bacck.

Vegeta: Yes, but at least he shut up.

Piccolo: Where are Goku and Sir. X?

Vegeta: Kakkarrot got himself blown up. He was alive enough to get to Dende last I saw him. I left Sir. X to decide whether to be shocked or angry that I was running off to deal with Freeza.

Piccolo: Hmmph.

Freeza: That wasn't nice, Vegeta.

Vegeta: *Blasts Freeza again*.

Piccolo: This could last a while.

Freeza: Don't be so cocky, 'prince'.

*Vegeta looks around in time to notice the cloud of energy disks that are circling him and Piccolo.*

Vegeta: *Blasts toward Freeza*.

*A disk flies into his side, but Piccolo pulls him out of its path*.

Vegeta: Let go of me.

Piccolo: If I didn't think you were useful, I would. *Throws Vegeta at Freeza*.

Freeza: What? Goku: *Appears behind Freeza and kicks him into the ground, crater-style.*

Vegeta: Kakkarrot, do you have to do that all the time?

Goku: Sorry. But hey, King Kai...

*Freeza headbutts Goku*.

Piccolo: Will you two please keep your guard up?

Goku: Yow, sorry again...

Vegeta: Gah! If we can't kill him, then let's imprison him.

Freeza: Ho ho ho ho ho! You might find that tactic a bit difficult.

Goku: Solar Flare!

Freeza: Ah! What was that? Is this a joke?

Piccolo: Vegeta, go!

Vegeta: *Charges Freeza, but gets tail-smacked*.

Freeza: I can still hear, you know.

Piccolo: *Antennae-zaps Freeza*.

Sir. X: Leave the rest to me.

Goku/Piccolo/Vegeta/Freeza: Huh?

Sir. X: *Traps Freeza and Piccolo in an Energy Tunnel.*

*Meanwhile, in the middle of nowhere...*

Nam: I do not hord the lake from travelers in need of water. But I do not trust attempts to decicrate it.

Vekin: We're only going to look at the bottom of it. We won't damage the lake.

Nam: Very well. I wish you a peaceful quest.

Kairin: Hiding it in a lake that moves... briliant.

Vekin: It's still going to take time to search.

At: *Steps into the shallows and morphs into a trout*.

Kairin: Well, that should help.

Nam: I hope there aren't any evil spirits involved with that power.

Kairin: Not that I know of.

Lady(OS): Something's up ahead.

Kairin: How do they keep finding us?

Nam: Do you know that person?

Kairin: She's helping Iciicla. If she gets here before we can find it...

Vekin: I'll deal with her. Maybe she didn't get a good look at me...

At(Telepathy): I think I found it, but I can't get it out by myself.

Kairin: Awe jees... I didn't bring swimming trunks.

Buu: *Flies in with Trunks in toe*. Buu help!

Trunks: Hey! Buu, what are you doing? !

Kairin: Ur... not... that kind of Trunks.

Lady: There they are!

Trunks: Wah!

Vekin: Hey, wait! Buu, can you get something for us?

Nam: This creature is not normal.

Trunks: Don't worry. The Grand Supreme Kai's essence is suppressing the demonic magic.

Buu: What you want from Buu?

Vekin: There's something buried in the lake.

Buu: Buu find! *Dives in*.

Lady: I think you just led us to the Time Matrix.

Trunks: Umm, what's all this about?

Lady: I don't know. All I know is that Iciicla promised to let Zalantar go if I give it to her.

Trunks: We can get her away from Iciicla, just...

Lady: Your meddling got her arm bit off! We just give the thing to Iciicla, and that's the end of it.

Nam: It is not wise to trust people that are so tainted as to threaten those you love. She will only hurt you and your Zalantar once she has what she wants.

Buu: Is this it? *Holds up what seems to be a bird skeleton fashioned into a staff of some kind.*

Vekin: Ur... no.

At(Telepathy): This way!

Buu: *Dives again*.

Trunks: *catches bird-bone-staff*. Listen, nothing's happening to your girl. Just back off, and Iciicla will lose for good.

Iciicla: I beg to differ. *Blasts Kairin into the lake*.

Nam: Stay back, evil creature!

Iciicla: Are you going to make me?

Nam: If I must.

Iciicla: *blasts, but Trunks jumps in the way and reflects the blast with the bone-staff*.

Trunks: That's enough. You're so sick that Hell was probably glad to cough you up.

Iciicla: Foolish boy! You call me sick? Hahahaha! You don't even know the half of it. Namek is under the control of Captain Ginyu at this very moment. Freeza is leading your stronger friends to their doom, and all the advantages that Cell once had are mine!

Trunks: So that's why you resort to using little girls to track down an artifact?

Iciicla: It's worked, hasn't it?

Buu: *Comes up with a large offwhite sphere over his head.* Is this it?

Iciicla: And now I win!

*And... there is an enormous explosion.*